Explore
Category
-
Funny Video & Movies
- Funny Video & Movies
- Funny animal videos
- Funny cat videos
- Funny dog videos
- Funny car videos
- Funny game videos
- Funny Asian videos
- Funny video commercials
- Funny sports & games videos
- Funny kid videos
- Funny sexy videos
- Funny cartoon videos
- Funny adult videos
- Funny celebrity videos
- Funny stupid videos
- Funny romance videos
- Funny man videos
- Funny woman videos
- Funny gay & lesbian videos
- Funny political videos
- Funny work/office videos
- Funny movie trailers
- Funny music videos
- Funny football videos
- Funny family videos
- Funny travel videos
- Funny science videos
- Funny halloween videos
- Funny Christmas videos
- Funny Valentine videos
- Funny thanksgiving videos
-
Funny Cartoons
- Funny Cartoons
- Greeting card cartoons
- Funny sexy cartoons
- Funny political cartoons
- Funny Thanksgiving cartoons
- Funny animals cartoons
- Funny dog cartoons
- Funny animated cartoons
- Funny women cartoons
- Funny wedding cartoons
- Funny drunk cartoons
- Funny nude cartoons
- Crazy frog cartoons
- Funny work cartoons
- Funny Christmas cartoons
- Funny Birthday cartoons
- Funny cat cartoons
- Funny sport cartoons
- Funny gay cartoons
- Funny men cartoons
- Funny police cartoons
- Funny love cartoons
- Funny kid cartoons
- Funny Flashes
- Funny Sounds
-
Funny Ringtones
- Funny Ringtones
- Funny ringtones
- Exciting ringtones
- Mystery ringtones
- Nature ringtones
- Romantic ringtones
- War ringtones
- Halloween ringtones
- New Year & Xmas ringtones
- Techno ringtones
- Valentine ringtones
- DJ ringtones
- Scary ringtones
- Crazy ringtones
- Movie ringtones
- Music ringtones
- Funny animal ringtones
- Alien ringtones
- Accessory ringtones
- Bell ringtones
- Mosquito ringtones
- Human sound ringtones
- Instrumental ringtones
- Arabic ringtones
- Kids ringtones
- Rock ringtones
- Ethnic ringtones
- Happy birthday ringtones
- Rap ringtones
- Breakdance ringtone
- Voice ringtones
- Opera ringtones
- Games ringtones
- Lounge ringtones
- Funny instrument ringtones
- Drunk ringtones
- Laugh ringtones
- Electronic melody ringtone
- Dirty ringtone
- Miscellaneous ringtones
- Thanksgiving ringtones
- Mouse ringtones
- Baby ringtones
-
Audio Clips
- Audio Clips
- Effects audio clip
- Funny audio clip
- Music audio clip
- Weird audio clip
- Erotic audio clip
- Christmas audio clip
- Halloween/scary audio clip
- Birthday audio clip
- Laugh audio clip
- Animal audio clip
- Nature audio clip
- Voice audio clip
- Scream audio clip
- Instrumental audio clip
- Non-vocal songs
- MIDI Store
- Funny Remixes
- Funny Song Parodies
-
Funny Pictures
- Funny Pictures
- Animal photos
- Baby pictures
- Car photos
- Celebrity photos
- Funny photos
- Holidays photos
- House pictures
- Kiss pictures
- New world wonder photos
- Pet gallery
- Playboy photos
- Sportsmen photo
- War photos
- Wedding photos
- Valentine pictures
- Halloween pictures
- American Idol photos
- Black and White pictures
- Christmas photos
- Tattoo pictures
- Winter photos
- Summer photos
- Autumn photos
- Spring photos
- Beach photos
- Sunset photos
- Aerial photos
- Prom pictures
- Flower pictures
- Country photos
- 7 world wonders photos
- Garden pictures
- Movie picture
- Thanksgiving pictures
- Miscellaneous pictures
-
Wallpapers
- Wallpapers
- Animated/Cartoon Wallpaper
- Funny Wallpaper
- Celebrity Wallpaper
- Sexy Wallpaper
- 3D and Digital art Wallpaper
- Valentine/Love Wallpaper
- Nature Wallpaper
- Game Wallpaper
- Movie Wallpaper
- Music Wallpaper
- Christmas Wallpaper
- Flower Wallpaper
- Beach Wallpaper
- Final fantasy Wallpaper
- Car Wallpaper
- Animal Wallpaper
- Landscape Wallpaper
- Art Wallpaper
- Photograph Wallpaper
- Space Wallpaper
- Sport Wallpaper
- Military Wallpaper
- Model Wallpaper
- Bikini Wallpaper
- Thanksgiving Wallpaper
-
Funny Jokes
- Funny Jokes
- Kid jokes
- Blonde jokes
- Adult jokes
- Political jokes
- Family jokes
- School jokes
- Clean jokes
- Funny quotes
- Lawyer quotes
- Bar Jokes
- Free jokes
- Animal jokes
- Business jokes
- Celebrities jokes
- Christmas jokes
- Computer jokes
- Condom jokes
- Crazy jokes
- Dirty jokes
- Drunk jokes
- Food jokes
- Gays & Lesbians jokes
- Gender jokes
- Holidays jokes
- Job jokes
- Lawyer jokes
- Marriage jokes
- Medical jokes
- Office jokes
- Redneck jokes
- Sex jokes
- Sports jokes
- Women jokes
- Work jokes
- Halloween jokes
- Thanksgiving jokes
-
Short Stories
- Short Stories
- Best short story
- Romance/Love short story
- Children short story
- Teen short story
- Christmas short story
- Biography short story
- Funny short story
- Scary/Horror short story
- Classic short story
- American short story
- British short story
- Australian short story
- Fiction short story
- Science fiction short story
- Adult short story
- Family short story
- Gay/Lesbian short story
- Inspirational short story
- Fairy tale short story
- Chicken soup for soul
-
Funny Quizzes
- Quizzes
- Personality quiz
- Romance/love quiz
- Teen quiz
- Movie quiz
- Music quiz
- Funny sex quiz
- Funny Q&A
- Kid quiz
- IQ test
- EQ test
- Animal quiz
- Celebrities quiz
- Entertainment quiz
- Geography quiz
- History quiz
- Literature quiz
- Math quiz
- Science quiz
- People quiz
- Religion quiz
- World quiz
- Funny game
- Humanities quiz
- Hobbies quiz
- Puzzle
- Brain teaser
- Tips
Holidays
Free media tool
Our pages
- AVZIO
- Short Stories
- Biography short story
- For Barry
For Barry
“Wish not so much to live long, as to live well.”
-- Benjamin Franklin
“Death is not a door that we walk toward. Death is the act of walking itself.”
-- John Fowles
My brother, Barry, was sixteen months my junior. On September 21, 1985, he put a .357 Magnum into his mouth and spray-painted the back wall. He was twenty years old and it was my mother’s birthday.
Why did my brother choose to end his own life? I don’t know. The answer to that question died with him. But still, perhaps I can make a few observations, exploit my misfortune and pick the bones of a dead man.
Shortly before graduating from high school, Barry talked to an Army recruiter. He wanted to follow in my footsteps and become an electronics technician, but I didn’t think the field would suit him. An eye test revealed his inability to distinguish between two shades of yellow-green, so he had to choose another field. He chose to become an MP, a Military Policeman.
In many ways, we were alike. We were both idealists, wanting to change the world in our own way. I meant to do it with my writing and my philosophy. He would do it through a career in law enforcement. I knew this was right for him. As usual, his approach was much more practical than mine.
Barry entered the military and married his first love soon thereafter. He enjoyed a brief but brilliant career because he had found a purpose. All was well with the world. But at the end of his two years, he let his wife talk him into quitting.
Back home, I researched the local law enforcement agencies for him. He was twenty years old, meaning only the Sheriff’s Department would hire him. He returned home, applied and was hired to guard the jails.
I remember Barry’s time at the Police Academy only too well. Typed notes were required, but he could not type, so I did this for him. I learned about law enforcement in the process. He enjoyed practicing his hand-to-hand combat training on me a bit too much, but again, I learned much in the process.
We went to the old haunts together. He could still play a video game for thirty minutes on a single quarter. When we played doubles, my purpose was to give him two-minute breathers.
We went to a movie together and some fellow behind us wanted to start a fight to impress his girlfriend. The old Barry would’ve “kicked some ass,” but my little brother was a man now.
He test-drove a sports car not because he wanted to buy it, but just because he wanted to drive one. He drove it seventy miles per hour on a winding road, explaining, “This is how I would really drive it.” He kept telling the salesman, who was on the job for his first day, “I’ll show them my badge” and flooring the accelerator.
I also remember the last time that I talked to Barry. It was maybe a week before he killed himself. He asked me to go to the movies with him, but I was too wrapped up in my own life. I can even quote my last words to him. “Why don’t you go do something with your wife?” He never told me that she had left him a month earlier.
Thus ended Barry’s grand dream of changing the world. He sat behind a desk, reading paperbacks and spraying inmates with a fire hose to break up fights. He walked down halls as inmates spat on him and flung cups of p*ss at him. He saw human nature at its ugliest. But more importantly, he was not fighting for the good cause.
Barry went to work; he went home; he paid bills. He was utterly alone wherever he was. Many people do this and perhaps a rare few even have the courage to ask Is this all there is? But perhaps saying Yes is more painful to nobler souls.
Perhaps he should not have bottled everything up inside until it exploded, but we all know that “real men” are tough (another shared trait). Perhaps it would have been more bearable if he had not been alone, but everyone close to him is to blame for that. But we can say “perhaps” and “he should have” all we want. He's still dead.
Thinking back on our lives, I realized that my little brother had always been a role model for me. He still is. Much later I realized that he thought of me the same way. He looked up to me and I never knew until it was too late.
I liked to think that he could have always come to me if he had a problem. After his death, I criticized him because he didn't come to me. But then I remembered that he did come to me. I told him to get the hell out of my life and he did exactly that.
You may reply that it is not my fault, because I didn't know he would kill himself. Perhaps. But does that mean it's okay to treat someone like that the rest of the time? No. It is never okay. By turning him away, I killed my brother just as surely as if I'd pulled the trigger.
I wrote the above thoughts shortly after Barry’s death. I believed them. I believed that I had put my loss in the past, come to terms with my feelings and moved on. The casket was closed and Barry and his memory were buried. But then, almost sixteen years later, something unexpected happened. I found love.
When Barry died, I did not bury him. I buried my heart. I married the girl I was dating at the time, got a steady job, supported a household and built a life for myself. For this, I have no regrets. But I wasn’t happy and I didn’t know it. In this, I was much less honest than my little brother.
Now I like to think that I’ve finally learned a little about love. Not family love, as that is usually given and usually taken for granted. I mean the kind of love where you bare your soul to a complete stranger, where someone sees into the ugliness of your heart and loves you in spite of it. The kind of love I’d have never dreamed of finding until, one day, it finally happened.
Looking back at Barry’s life, I doubt he ever knew such love. Without it, there was no joy in his life. That’s why he ended it. Again, he was always more practical than I am.
I would have loved Barry even if he weren’t my little brother, but I never told him. Now it’s too late. Could I have prevented this tragedy? I’ll never know now. I missed the warning signs and he blew his brains out.
-- Benjamin Franklin
“Death is not a door that we walk toward. Death is the act of walking itself.”
-- John Fowles
My brother, Barry, was sixteen months my junior. On September 21, 1985, he put a .357 Magnum into his mouth and spray-painted the back wall. He was twenty years old and it was my mother’s birthday.
Why did my brother choose to end his own life? I don’t know. The answer to that question died with him. But still, perhaps I can make a few observations, exploit my misfortune and pick the bones of a dead man.
Shortly before graduating from high school, Barry talked to an Army recruiter. He wanted to follow in my footsteps and become an electronics technician, but I didn’t think the field would suit him. An eye test revealed his inability to distinguish between two shades of yellow-green, so he had to choose another field. He chose to become an MP, a Military Policeman.
In many ways, we were alike. We were both idealists, wanting to change the world in our own way. I meant to do it with my writing and my philosophy. He would do it through a career in law enforcement. I knew this was right for him. As usual, his approach was much more practical than mine.
Barry entered the military and married his first love soon thereafter. He enjoyed a brief but brilliant career because he had found a purpose. All was well with the world. But at the end of his two years, he let his wife talk him into quitting.
Back home, I researched the local law enforcement agencies for him. He was twenty years old, meaning only the Sheriff’s Department would hire him. He returned home, applied and was hired to guard the jails.
I remember Barry’s time at the Police Academy only too well. Typed notes were required, but he could not type, so I did this for him. I learned about law enforcement in the process. He enjoyed practicing his hand-to-hand combat training on me a bit too much, but again, I learned much in the process.
We went to the old haunts together. He could still play a video game for thirty minutes on a single quarter. When we played doubles, my purpose was to give him two-minute breathers.
We went to a movie together and some fellow behind us wanted to start a fight to impress his girlfriend. The old Barry would’ve “kicked some ass,” but my little brother was a man now.
He test-drove a sports car not because he wanted to buy it, but just because he wanted to drive one. He drove it seventy miles per hour on a winding road, explaining, “This is how I would really drive it.” He kept telling the salesman, who was on the job for his first day, “I’ll show them my badge” and flooring the accelerator.
I also remember the last time that I talked to Barry. It was maybe a week before he killed himself. He asked me to go to the movies with him, but I was too wrapped up in my own life. I can even quote my last words to him. “Why don’t you go do something with your wife?” He never told me that she had left him a month earlier.
Thus ended Barry’s grand dream of changing the world. He sat behind a desk, reading paperbacks and spraying inmates with a fire hose to break up fights. He walked down halls as inmates spat on him and flung cups of p*ss at him. He saw human nature at its ugliest. But more importantly, he was not fighting for the good cause.
Barry went to work; he went home; he paid bills. He was utterly alone wherever he was. Many people do this and perhaps a rare few even have the courage to ask Is this all there is? But perhaps saying Yes is more painful to nobler souls.
Perhaps he should not have bottled everything up inside until it exploded, but we all know that “real men” are tough (another shared trait). Perhaps it would have been more bearable if he had not been alone, but everyone close to him is to blame for that. But we can say “perhaps” and “he should have” all we want. He's still dead.
Thinking back on our lives, I realized that my little brother had always been a role model for me. He still is. Much later I realized that he thought of me the same way. He looked up to me and I never knew until it was too late.
I liked to think that he could have always come to me if he had a problem. After his death, I criticized him because he didn't come to me. But then I remembered that he did come to me. I told him to get the hell out of my life and he did exactly that.
You may reply that it is not my fault, because I didn't know he would kill himself. Perhaps. But does that mean it's okay to treat someone like that the rest of the time? No. It is never okay. By turning him away, I killed my brother just as surely as if I'd pulled the trigger.
I wrote the above thoughts shortly after Barry’s death. I believed them. I believed that I had put my loss in the past, come to terms with my feelings and moved on. The casket was closed and Barry and his memory were buried. But then, almost sixteen years later, something unexpected happened. I found love.
When Barry died, I did not bury him. I buried my heart. I married the girl I was dating at the time, got a steady job, supported a household and built a life for myself. For this, I have no regrets. But I wasn’t happy and I didn’t know it. In this, I was much less honest than my little brother.
Now I like to think that I’ve finally learned a little about love. Not family love, as that is usually given and usually taken for granted. I mean the kind of love where you bare your soul to a complete stranger, where someone sees into the ugliness of your heart and loves you in spite of it. The kind of love I’d have never dreamed of finding until, one day, it finally happened.
Looking back at Barry’s life, I doubt he ever knew such love. Without it, there was no joy in his life. That’s why he ended it. Again, he was always more practical than I am.
I would have loved Barry even if he weren’t my little brother, but I never told him. Now it’s too late. Could I have prevented this tragedy? I’ll never know now. I missed the warning signs and he blew his brains out.
[HOT VIDEO] All those ice bucket bloopers you didn\'t see
Subscribe Now!
Story of Biography short story
story Information
Upload Date: 31/12/1969 |
Downloads: 1255 |
Other Stories
Other Stories996 downloads
2532 downloads
1233 downloads
1988 downloads
1295 downloads
1708 downloads