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HAMPERING

If one of your humans is engaged in some activity and the other is idle, stay with the busy one. This is called "helping," otherwise known as hampering." 1) When supervising cooking, sit just behind the left heel of the cook. You cannot be seen and thereby stand a better chance of being stepped on and then picked up and comforted. 2) For book readers, get in close under the chin, between eyes and book, unless you can lie across the book itself. 3) For paperwork, lie so as to obscure as much of the work as possible. Pretend to doze, but every so often reach out and slap the pencil or pen. 4) When a human is holding the newspaper in front of him, jump on the back of the paper. Humans love to be startled. 5) When human is working at computer, jump up on desk, walk across keyboard, bat at mouse pointer on screen and then lie in human's lap, preventing typing.
Kick and Fail
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