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- Men's answer to Maxine
Men's answer to Maxine
Men strike back!
How many men does it take to open a beer ?
None. It should be opened when she brings it
-------------------------------------------------------------
Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Why do women have smaller feet than men ?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
-------------------------------------------------------------
How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart ?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
--------------------------------------------------------------
How do you fix a woman's watch ?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Why do men fart more than women ?
Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.
--------------------------------------------------------------
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first ?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
--------------------------------------------------------------
What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig ?
A woman who won't do what she's told
--------------------------------------------------------------
I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Women will never be equal to men
until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
--------------------------------------------------------------
In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Send this to a few good men who need a laugh and to the select few women who can handle the truth!
How many men does it take to open a beer ?
None. It should be opened when she brings it
-------------------------------------------------------------
Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Why do women have smaller feet than men ?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
-------------------------------------------------------------
How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart ?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
--------------------------------------------------------------
How do you fix a woman's watch ?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Why do men fart more than women ?
Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.
--------------------------------------------------------------
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first ?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
--------------------------------------------------------------
What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig ?
A woman who won't do what she's told
--------------------------------------------------------------
I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Women will never be equal to men
until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
--------------------------------------------------------------
In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Send this to a few good men who need a laugh and to the select few women who can handle the truth!
story Information
Upload Date: 31/12/1969 |
Downloads: 4211 |
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